I wanted to kill abuser, says ex-Newcastle youngster Bell

Derek Bell, one of 20 footballers who have come forward and spoke out about being abused by former coaches, recounted the day he went to kill his former coach, who subjected him to "horrfic" abuse on "hundreds" of occasions.

"I was going to kill the guy. I thought, 'no, I can't live any more, everywhere I seem to go he's there'," Bell said.

"This brought back all the memories to the forefront of my head, and I wanted to kill the guy.

"I went to his house with a 12-inch knife hidden in my pocket, and I kicked his door in. Luckily for him, that evening, he wasn't in".

Bell then said that he went round to his abusers house a couple of days later with a hidden tape recorder in an attempt to get Ormond to admit the abuse. Bell says that Ormond never once apologised, and simply hoped that Bell wouldn't go to the police.

He added: "I just asked him the questions 'Why, why, why?' What was his motivation to find a need to constantly abuse me, threaten me, bribe me, befriend my family?

"And not one time did he say he was sorry. He just said 'I don't know why'. His main aim was 'you're not going to tell the police, are you?'"

Bell said that the abuse has led to serious mental health problems and has also tried to commit suicide three times.

"I've come forward to raise awareness and help victims who are coming forward," he said.

"I've been through the court system, I've been through different things, so if I can give people help and support... be brave, don't be ashamed".